Change libraries frequently. It allows you to place the blame on your predecessor for anything that is wrong.

If a teacher discusses a unit with you well in advance, it is a certainty that she will be absent on the days scheduled, the substitute cannot administer the unit, and when the teacher returns she cannot do the unit because she has to make up for lost time.

When you spend half your library budget on a teacher's request for a course the odds are that the teacher will quit or be transferred and the course will be dropped or changed.

If you close the library only for 1day before year end for administrative tasks it is a fact that 2 teachers will ask you to do a library lesson on that day. These are teachers you couldn't get into the library before but now need marking time.

No books are lost except those that are most needed and hardest to replace.

Books will remain upright on the shelf until you go to place another book beside them.

You can be sure the student who has the most overdue books reads the least.

If it's a good book, it's out of stock. If it's an excellent book, it's out of print.

No matter how many books you have on a subject the student always thinks they're all "too big".

No matter how long you keep an article or piece of information you will never need it till you throw it away.

If you have lost one issue of a magazine there will be 35 students who will require that issue.